// i'm a goddess on my knees \\

I've managed to procure a mask. And while my costume is certainly hastily put together, I'm not likely to be attending any parties of relative importance, so I'll survive. The mask is a bird, which I know is probably very typical, but it was the one which caught my eye the most. I suppose it's a very popular choice, but I just find it much easier to coordinate to than most of the others.

Even Gareth's getting into the spirit of things, but I suppose he's a Kanemorian at heart, and they never do say no to a party. I won't argue with this, at least. It's nice to have everyone enjoying themselves so much.

I've been informed that we'll arrive at Feldri within the week, which I have to say is absolutely wonderful news. I've also been informed that I haven't truly celebrated the Night of the Dead until I've been in Atsiria for one. The choice of words makes me a bit skeptical, but then again, I've heard things here and there. I'm not sure what the plans for the night itself are, except that I'm to obtain a mask and some sort of costume as soon as possible.

We'll be staying in Feldri for the span of a month, I believe, selling wares and resupplying them, and while I certainly still have my share of duties as Gareth's personal guard, I think most of it is probably going to be rather free time for me. Which is greatly overdue, I have to say.

Current Mood: good

Well, I'm afraid the Festival was uneventful for me. I'm not particularly disappointed, but then, as I said, the holiday's never meant that much to me. We stopped for a bit and swapped our gifts, and once we settled down for the night we all had some drinks that Gareth picked up in town for just the occasion, but the next morning we were off right away again.

I've received a couple of Atsirian books that are apparently meant to help refine my skills, but I have to admit I have a rather large set of doubts about them. Said skills have shown no sign of improving, and I'm skeptical as to whether books will really help at all.

Current Mood: calm

Well, this will certainly be the first Festival I've spent not in a city. I suppose I have to get used to it, since it's likely to be quite common for the rest of my life, but to tell the truth, I don't find myself that bothered in the first place. I bought some gifts when we stopped before, and mailed off the very few that required sending. The others I'm holding onto until the day itself, though it's very hard to keep them hidden out here, allow me to say.

Mm, I have to admit, the Festival doesn't ... hm~ It's just not important to me like it seems to be to so many people here. To tell the truth, I don't quite see the point, but I suppose to each his own. Holidays in general don't exactly mean the world to me, honestly. They come and they go and the rest of life goes on regardless.

Current Mood: busy

You know the curious thing about travel, is that you tend to forget how nice it is when you're not traveling. Mm, I know, it sounds ridiculous, but I don't think I ever realized how wonderful baths actually were until just now. Mm, I could stay in one all day and do nothing else and be perfectly content.

I imagine the locals are laughing at the tourist I'm making myself look like, but I don't even care. Some of us aren't used to the sand finding its way into every crevice of our clothes. Maybe one day, I'll be more accustomed, but for now, I'll enjoy the bath, thank you.

Current Mood: relaxed

Mm, I know no one's interested in hearing about me, but I've been getting more used to things here. I wouldn't say I've stopped sunburning just yet, but I am better with the heat. And even with the pace we've been taking making our way through the desert.

Apparently we're supposed to be reaching a waytown within a week. I know a waytown is hardly much to be excited about, but it's been quite a while since I've seen civilization and I'll take what I can get. Any opportunity to rest a bit is better than nothing, in my opinion.

[very sloppy Atsirian]

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[Trade]

Well, Jaezera is laughing at my terrible handwriting now. It was her request, so I hardly think she has the right to mock me. I still can't make any sort of connection between what she says and the words she shows me. Maybe I'm just too old for this.

Current Mood: calm

Hm, I know it's not Wednesday, but I do have a question.

The woman I've been trying to learn some Atsirian from -- she agreed, by the way -- has told me, albeit in very broken Trade, that it might be easier for me to learn the language by writing first. Is this true? I was under the impression, personally, that speaking it would be easier, but perhaps it's just how Atsirian works. Mm, or perhaps it's different for everyone. I'm hardly the one to ask, I haven't put my mind to learning a language since I was a girl.

Is there somebody who can offer me some insight on this?

Current Mood: curious

Mm, whoever recommended the aloe, it's perfect. One of the nomads who's guiding us happens to have quite a supply of it, though I can't imagine she ever burns, her skin is so dark. She was all too happy to lend me some, once she understood what I was asking for. She speaks little Trade, it seems. Luckily enough, Gareth is fluent in Atsirian, so once he heard my attempts to ask for it, he translated for me.

I have to say, not knowing the language here is shaping up to be quite the problem, for more reasons than just asking for aloe. I see the way the girl looks at Gareth, and while I have to say that my own estimation of him is no higher than hers, it would certainly be nice to communicate it. Perhaps we can come to some agreement -- I'll teach her Trade, and she teaches me Atsirian. I hope she'll agree. She seems like an interesting woman.

Current Mood: calm

The hat didn't help nearly as much as I hoped it would. I'm still quite burnt, but luckily enough, I took it upon myself to purchase some burn lotion just in case of this sort of occasion. We've still quite a way to go, out here, unsurprisingly, but that's the way of it. Atsiria is far too large of a country, in my estimation.

I think Gareth -- my employer -- actually agrees with me, though you'd think that a man traveling into the depths of Atsiria would have some sort of idea what to expect from it. I'm beginning to think he's new at this. It would certainly explain all of his other ridiculous little hangups.

Current Mood: hot

[Filter: Private]

Hm, very well. I could keep railing against you like a child, or I could call it quits while I'm ahead. It's quite a difficult decision to make.

On the one hand, I do enjoy doing what I can for my dear, dear former employer, but really, it's tiring. All I'm managing to do is make myself look the irrational woman who can't let trifling matters pass her by, isn't that right? And with every attempt to bring you down, the journals are just more likely to see a bitter woman who holds a grudge.

While I won't deny that I do indeed hold a grudge, it's not exactly a healthy image to cultivate. No, no, I'll leave you be for now, my lady. I do have better ways to spend my time, after all. I'm a busy woman now, you see.

Mm, in fact, I have a hat purchase to see to. Away I go, then.

Current Mood: okay

I have to say that I didn't expect us to stay long in Kavan, but, well, here we still are. Apparently my employer believes we need more guards, and at this point, it's his money, I can't argue with how he spends it.

We'll need at least a couple of guides, too, he says. I imagine he didn't hire them before because none of them seem to ever leave this country.

Dragons, it's hot. How people put up with this for more than a few weeks, I'll never know.

Current Mood: hot

[Filter: Private]

Hardly the most glamorous job, now, is it?

Hm. I can't argue, though. The man treats me like something he's scraped off his shoe, certainly, but everyone has to start somewhere, and I think I prefer it when he's honest. At least he's not looking at me down his nose and pretending he's simply following the natural order.

Hm, so. A boat to Kavan, a long trip to Feldri. At least the Atsirians he's hired seem like they have their feet firmly on the ground. I imagine we'll get along quite swimmingly, assuming I can understand a word they're speaking.

You know, the most curious thing about birthdays is that they stop meaning anything at all once you get older. Here I stand, freshly 24, and I'm more concerned about whether my new employer is entirely trustworthy than the fact that I'm another year older.

Just a thought. I'm not sure it means anything at all to any of you, people of the journals, but I see no reason not to share my, hm, insight.

For the extremely curious, I am indeed on a boat. To Salinda. Tempting as freezing my limbs off in Korin was, I decided to go for a slightly cheaper route. I don't have any sort of plans for once I arrive, but I have to say, it's refreshing to just flow with the wind, for once. Much less restrictive.

[Filter: Private]

So, what's left is checking prices. I'd prefer Salinda, at this point -- Korin, really, who wants to work there? But if the price is right I can't precisely refuse. Any money I can save is for the better. I don't precisely have a safety net anymore.

And what place would hire a thief? None. But I have to take some chance. I refuse to sit at home and rot.

Hm, at least the rumors of trouble on the roads have gone down. I might as well head for Aeda sooner rather than later, then.

Of course, with my luck, they'll pick the moment I set foot out of town to come raging out of the woods. Wouldn't that just be a fantastic way to start the trip.

Can someone tell me how much a ship out of Aeda into anywhere costs? I don't care where. As far as my money can get me away from Dentoria. Colndor, or someplace in Atsiria, I really don't care.

Current Mood: busy

[Filter: Private]

Ugh, it's one thing to avoid the subject, but this is something else. It's hanging in the air all the time, I get the hints, I'm not thick. Yes, a failure, that's exactly what you raised, a thief. It's not like you would listen to a word I said if I --

I need to get out of here.

Current Mood: aggravated

[Filter: Private]

They haven't mentioned it yet. Where am I supposed to go from here? As if any house in Dentoria would ever hire me again, after that. Even if they would, the job can hardly be any more glamorous than that one was.

Ugh, what now?

It's Festival. I shouldn't have to think about this.

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